The tour has started, cycling season is peaking in Chi-town and I am a little bit of a local stud. While I am stoked to see the component upgrades and my hard work this year finally pay off, I gotta say that I am more freakin' stoked about the ladies clamoring to get a glance of me in my fine ass war lycra.
For example, this fine young thing wanted a huge, heaping piece of me. I mean, look how she has chosen to position herself. She knew what she was doing. Contact me, sweetheart. I'll show you a nacho.
Total bullshit that the first Stupidweek race was only for the Cat 1/2s. Especially since I saw some of that shit and I think I could have hung in for a while. Now, I am not saying I could have won it. I'm not an idiot, fools. But I know I could have hung in with the pack and rubbed chamois with some hellish neon green ass-stained chamois and shown off my pearly white shiny shoes.
Fortunately, I'll get enough chances over the next week or two here and get that upgrade that is due to me. I mean honeslty, Fowlkes, how can you hold me back?
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